Posted in America by Katie and Billy Swan on 1/10/2012
We packed our lives into our little silver Corolla Sunday
night and drove a solid 13 hours on busy highways from Chicago to Georgia yesterday
morning. We tried to be careful in
choosing what we would bring, but when push came to shove, we had to remove four
boxes at the last minute. I tried not to
look too closely at what I was leaving behind-I mean who needs a sweatshirt in
the south? However, if you come
to visit us, you'll have to bring your own cup because we only managed to fit
in two.
There are a
lot of unknowns in our future. We don't
have a place to live [yet]. We don't
know what our daily life is going to look like at the office. We've been eating oranges and peanut butter
sandwiches for the past four meals. And
I already have what remains of our whole wheat bread ready for dinner. Nevertheless, compared to goat intestines,
this still echoes of gourmet!
Although I
expect to live like this when we travel, it sure seems strange to do it on this
side of the ocean. I kind of like
it. I think we were born for this.
Tonight
we're going apartment, trailer park, basement or garage shopping. Whatever we can find. Then we'll get to unpack our overstuffed car
and set up our home. It's been quite a while since I've used that
term with any semi-permanent meaning. If
it's big enough we'd love to have you over for dinner when you're ever down
this way. It is 62F today. Does that help entice you?
This is
more of an incomplete update than a detailed one. Hopefully we'll be able to fill in some of
the blanks in the days to come. Until
then we'll be keeping ourselves busy with the apprenticeship program and
grocery shopping. We get to start
everything from scratch! I cannot
wait.
Love you
all, the Swans.
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Posted in Albania by Katie and Billy Swan on 11/29/2011
You may choose to look the other way, but you can never say that you did not know. -William Wilberforce
Beautiful gypsy girl (photo by squadmate Amanda Dorough)
My mind has been overwhelmed a little bit these days. It is hard for me to lay down at night without vivid pictures of orphans, street kids and hopeless families circling through my mind. In fact, I have come to believe that some of these individuals have been burned permanently into the backs of my eyelids. And to be honest, I'm relieved because I never-never-never want to forget.
When I was 18, I remember an eight-year-old boy telling me that his father had just left the night before and his mother didn't know how the family would eat. I remember saying I was sorry and turning the other way. This was the eighth person to ask me for food that day. I remember the regret I still feel today that I didn't do something more.
As a teacher, I remember asking my classroom of 180 African fourth graders how many of them had gone for days without food and every single one of them raised their hand. I remember the feeling of hopelessness that covered me as I asked God what I could do. I remember that same feeling overwhelming me this week while we handed out free hotdogs and juice to a hungry family of four.
Who couldn't LOVE these girls?
I remember looking into the desperate eyes of a mother who had spent the month watching her newborn slowly starve to death, simply because she didn't have the money needed to take care of him. I remember the unspoken joy as we provided the little resources needed to change her world. And then, I remember the sea of hungry eyes at the city dump two months ago, whose eyes remain desperate.
At a Bolivian orphanage I remember the pain that filled my gut when a young orphan asked me why and I didn't have any answers. I remember holding her and crying with her when words seemed just too shallow a response. I remember leaving a chunk of my bleeding heart behind when I had to go.
I remember the feeling of getting on the plane to the USA and trying to reconcile these two worlds into one. I remember failing miserably and resorting to living a double life. I remember that I have to do this all over again in one week and my stomach still lurches at the idea.
But then I remember other truth. I remember that God has called me to do something. I remember that He is allowing me to do something. And I remember that this calling is not limited to any border, language or need.
And so, here we go. Two years of hot showers, stocked grocery stores, laundry machines and family a mere phone call away. Two years of English speakers, air conditioned gyms, and vegetarian meals. Two years away from such tangible pain and need. Two years amidst a whole new world of tangible pain and need. Two years trying not to forget these people and this calling.
Another beautiful gypsy girl (photo by squadmate Amanda Dorough)
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Posted in Romania by Katie and Billy Swan on 11/21/2011
I, Bill, have been trying to write this blog for over a week
now. I've been processing my time as a
squad leader on the World Race, and I have to tell you that it has been the
most amazing 4 months of my life (and I've had a pretty awesome life)! This is my attempt to express in words the
way God has blown my mind.

I've seen God move in ways that I had only heard stories
about. I've seen people step into the freedom that God has for them, find
physical and emotional healing, learn to use their voice, to trust people
enough to let them in, to love as Christ loves, and to bring a message of hope
to the nations!
All I can say is "Wow, God!"
Of all these things, I think my favorite moment is when somebody
realizes for the first time how much God actually loves them. I've seen this look so many times over these
past four months, and it is worth giving my life to!
You see, when I went left four months ago, I was excited to
be able to share my wisdom, my biblical knowledge, my masterful insight into
people's emotional and relational lives and of course to have fun all the
while. These were what I saw as my major
contributions to this squad. God had
different plans.

The most significant contribution I made to these 55 awesome
men and women of God was to show them a glimpse of what Father God's love is
like. This really is the most important
thing! Everything else pales in
comparison to this. Last week we got to
have a time of debriefing with our squad, and as people talked to me and about
me, they spoke not of my wisdom or anything, but of how I loved them. I now understand when Paul writes in 1
Corinthians 13 that even if I have crazy spiritual gifts and abilities, it
doesn't mean jack if I don't love people!
Honestly, it has been crazy.
I feel like I have 55 kids, and I would venture to say that some of them
see me as a kind of father! In these
past four months, I have prayed harder, laughed louder, cared more deeply,
hugged more intensely, had more snot and tears on my shirt, and loved more
passionately than I ever thought possible!
All of this has been a reflection of God's Spirit at work in me, because
I do not have it in me to love people like this in my own strength.

I can't tell you what a great privilege it has been to serve
and love this squad, and God has used them to unlock things in my own heart and
prepare me for loving people the rest of my life!
Thank you God, for knowing exactly what I needed and for
giving me the honor of representing Your love to Your children. Thank you W Squad for loving me back and for
allowing me to be a part of your life! I
am forever transformed.

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Posted in Albania by Katie and Billy Swan on 10/25/2011
We
often get asked why.
Why
we go on these crazy trips to countries people have never heard of.
Why we purposefully give up electricity, hot showers and good
food. Why we can't find a normal job, and live a normal life. Why?
So,
here we go. Our answer from the last 3.5 months.
For
Jonathan. Whose father died
when he was 10 years old, leaving him with nine younger siblings. He
has not known a day off since because his family depends on him for
survival.
For
the nameless.
Who work 10 hour days in the dump gathering plastic bottles from the
piles of trash and walk away with 2.50$. One day Samantha found a
dead baby amongst the garbage.
For
Fabio.
Whose mother left him at home when he was an infant. The neighborhood kids would then come over and watch porn movies and imitate whatever they saw
on him.
For
Diego,
Daniel
and Eddie.
Who inhale glue, paint thinner and other chemicals to alleviate the
pain caused by hunger and cold.
For
Timmy. He watched his father die and his mother remarry.
Only to then find himself [literally] sleeping with the pigs because
his stepfather hated him.
For
Marco.
A man who is bedridden. He cannot walk. He cannot talk. His
sheets are stained from urine and a stench of rotting flesh
penetrates his room. The only visible movement comes from the trails
of gnats and ants that dine on his open sores.
For
Hector. Whose father is also his own grandfather. He was
thrown away; dropped off on the streets with nothing but the clothes
on his back.
For
Juan.
Who at the age of 5 already struggles with alcoholism.
For
Us.
Who are so thankful we get to live our lives loving these very people.
The
Spirit of the LORD God is
upon me,
because
the LORD has anointed me
to
bring good news to the poor;
he
has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to
proclaim freedom to the captives,
and
the opening of the prison to those who are bound.
Isaiah
61:1
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Posted in Bolivia by Katie and Billy Swan on 10/11/2011
We
have been in South America for three wonderful months and we begin
our travels to Albania (Eastern Europe) at 2:45am tomorrow. These
months have been filled with loving the most beautiful orphans,
caring for the sick, holding the forgotten, and watching our world
change around us.
It's
going to be hard to leave.
We
compiled a short video to grant you a better picture of what this
time has been like. Enjoy! And maybe the people will begin to break
your hearts like they have shattered ours.
We
LOVE you!
Two
absolutely, amazing teams of women LOVING people in their greatest
need.
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Posted in Bolivia by Katie and Billy Swan on 10/5/2011
When
I first met Daniel I was expecting him to be dead. He was lying,
passed out on the dirty cement in front of a small vegetable shop.
But when we gently tapped his shoulder, he slowly staggered to his
feet. All 70 pounds.
Daniel
was absolutely vile. He only had one pair of clothes and it showed.
His blue shirt was torn and died black with filth. His green pants
were extremely short, eight sizes too large, and held up by a rough
looking black rope. Even his yellow flip flops were well worn and
too small for his bloated feet.
Daniel
honestly looked like the walking dead. His body had been ravaged
heavily by HIV, tuberculosis and a hard life on the streets. His
arms and legs resembled 2-inch dowel rods, his cheeks sunk deep into
his face, and his eyes were tired and skeptical. He was nothing but
taught skin and brittle bones.
Although
Daniel is only fourteen years old, he carries the life
experiences of a 90-year old war vet. His nights are consumed by
horror and dread from the numerous rapes he endures at the hands of
older street boys. His days are covered in loneliness as he seeks to
find a family that does not exist. And, he fills his nostrils with
the only form of release he can find-the fumes of Elmer's glue.
This
month we're working with organizations that love, serve and reach out
to street children. Over half the boys who choose to come off the
streets leave the home their placed in and go back. They have known
the streets their whole life and struggle with the detox and
structure. Our beautiful little Daniel desperately needs this
intervention. This is a literal life or death situation and he
doesn't have much time left. Our organization has been working with
Daniel for three years and yesterday was the first time he agreed to
hope--the first time he moved off the streets. And in his wisdom he
told us, "At some point I am going to want to go back to the
streets, but I don't want to go back. So, when that happens, please
lock the doors and tie me down. I want a new life."
Please,
be praying for Daniel. He is a boy who has known so much pain, but
he's starting to believe there's something more out there. He's
starting to believe someone really does care for him. He's starting
to BELIEVE and it makes my heart happy.
One of our incredible teams outside the orphanage.
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Posted in Bolivia by Katie and Billy Swan on 9/26/2011
I'm
trying to imagine what it would be like to be her. To have
absolutely nothing in this world. To go to sleep lonely. To wake up
lonely. To live each day lonely. To be abandoned by my parents. To
be rejected by my world. To not even own the clothes on my back. To
have nothing.
To
wonder if you're special. To wonder if you have purpose. To wonder
if you even matter.
The
life of an orphan blows me away. I cannot comprehend living in a
tiny cement building with 30 other kids. To have two adults
attending everyone. To lay on my foam mattress each night and think
heartbreaking thoughts about my value, my worth and my life.
To
never have a home to go to. To never have parents to love. To never
have hope.
At
eighteen my beautiful Camilla will be released into this world. Even
the little things she clings to today will be gone. The caretakers
will have moved on to different kids. Her bedroom will be filled
with new orphans. And she'll have to move forward with nothing in
her pockets. Where will she go? What will she do? Who will care
about her?
My
heart is literally BREAKING this week as I wrestle every day and
night with what I can do. How I can save her from this fate. How I
can show her that's she's beautiful. How I can give her true hope.
How I can change her life.
It
shouldn't be like this. But it is. And I don't know what to do, but
I promise you I'm going to do something. I'm going to leave this
world different than I found it. I'm going to CHANGE the lives of
Camillas, Marias and Neeka around this world because I know a God
who empowers me to do so.
Religion
that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look
after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from
being polluted by the world [James 1:27].
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Posted in Peru by Katie and Billy Swan on 9/16/2011
Sometimes, we have a lot of fun. Prom on the World Race!
These last two months have been incredible! Katie and I have been able to lead a group of 56 people as they follow after God and seek to change the world. In the process, we've seen incredible changes in these sons and daughters of God, and we've seen Him at work in and through them. Here are two short stories to give you a taste of what I get to see every day!
ONE: While traveling from Ecuador to Peru, our squad stopped at a border town called Tumbes. While walking through the city center, some of our participants came across a woman who was sick, physically disabled and begging. She had an abdominal tumor and was in pretty rough shape. Our teams decided to pray for her and ask God to heal her broken body. As they were speaking words of life over her she stood up, her back straightened and she began dancing around-something she had not done in years. Her tumor (visibly) went away and instantly she began praising God. This quickly drew a crowd, as many of the locals had seen this deformed woman begging day after day. People started bringing children, friends and family to our squad pleading with them to pray over them as well. They knew the power of God was at work here and they wanted to be a part of it.
TWO: One of the beautiful women on our squad spoke with us the other night about some intense shame that she had been carrying. She shared about the horrific things that had been done to her and the guilt she had because of it. She felt as though she was a disappointment to God and to everyone around her. After some conversation, prayer, and the incredible work of God, she was able to shed the weight of guilt and shame that she had carried with her for all of her young adult life and experience the love of the Father. She was able to see that God is a Father who loves her and desires to see her walk in freedom! Freedom from the power of sin, guilt, shame and condemnation.
These are just two amazing ways that God has worked among His people. There are many more stories of physical, emotional and spiritual healing that have happened in just these two short months. It's the most incredible honor that God chooses to use us to bring the knowledge of His love and grace among the men and women of W Squad! There is absolutely nothing else I'd rather be doing with my life right now.
Kyle Dennard, amazing man of God who brings such joy to my life!
Keep praying for us and for these amazing children of God as there are so many more walls that need to come down, so much more guilt and shame that needs to be relieved, and so much more love to be experienced. Thanks for standing with us as we fight to reveal the truth, love and grace of this incredible God we serve! We really are living our dream!
A quick stop by a little place called Machu Picchu. Pretty awesome!
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Posted in Peru by Katie and Billy Swan on 9/4/2011
A surfing-fishing-boating community where two teams are working.
I
love my life. I mean I really LUUUUUUUVE my life. I love spending
my days with people who desperately need hope. I love encouraging
people who have the ability to change this world. I love joining
with them as they choose to do it. I love every part of this.
And
with that being said, these last two weeks have been a tad bit
difficult. My pack continues to lose weight and it's not because I'm
giving things away. I've peed my pants three times because of an
inflamed bladder and painful UTI. Our squad has been affected by a
serious robbery that included guns and brutal threats of murder and
human trafficking. We've had to move teams to different cities and
alter plans every three minutes to accommodate the changes. And,
I think I could sleep 42 hours straight just to recover from the
stress that has come with all of the above. It's just been a
lot to handle in a short time.
In
it, God has made it very clear that I have a serious choice to make.
I can chose to focus on the tiny little things that are making
my life more difficult or I can focus on the abundance of ways that
God is continuing to move in this place. I've realized these tiny
little things often seem to be
in the limelight, but if I choose to step back and take a good look,
I see the hand of God much more than anything else.
Let me give you a better idea of
what I mean. Here is another [very] accurate picture of the past
days.
We are working with a family
doctor from North Carolina who not only diagnosed my hives
immediately, but had an abundance of medication in his home that I
could [and did] use. My hives are about 97 percent gone at this
time! I have the most amazing husband I could ever ask for. He held
me when I cried this week, he told me it was all going to be okay,
and really, he makes every moment of this trip 10 times better simply
because he is here. Although our teams encountered some difficult
circumstances this past week, God's protection was all over the
place. Not one person was touched, harmed or injured. Everyone
walked away whole.
As if all this was not enough, I
have a bed to sleep in tonight, breath in my lungs, shoes on my feet,
food in my stomach, clothes on my back, people who love me, purpose
to my days, truth on my lips, hope in the depths of my soul, and a
God who loves me.
And
so, It's just been that kind of a month. The kind where God
reveals His goodness over and over and over again. The kind where I
could not imagine myself anywhere else. The kind where I just want
to sing out ballads of thankfulness to the ONE who is more than
enough. Much, much more than enough.
A day of market shopping and a receipt on toilet paper to top it off.
The finished product: homemade chili and fresh corn bread [delicious].
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Posted in Peru by Katie and Billy Swan on 8/27/2011
Coming to Peru has been a shock to my system. The never ending jungles of Ecuador has been exchanged for a sea of sand. Currently we're smack dab in the middle of a brown dessert. There's dust and sand everywhere-on the ground, in the air, and mainly in my lungs. The poverty level has increased greatly and the days are quite chilly. Not exactly the most beautiful place, but it's growing on me.
Billy and I spent the past week with a team in a little town called Chepen. We jumped into painting, children's programs and meal preparations (can I just say how thankful I am that I love rice because we have it at every meal). We even got to help host a surprise birthday party where we had to come up with a game that could cross language and cultural boundaries. So, we ended up playing musical chairs with 18 year olds. It was a riot to say the least!
Through this week I learned a hard lesson. And to be honest, I wasn't expecting it at all. While we were in Chepen, I was attacked by some super dessert bugs. I'm not sure what they were, but I can tell you that my body hated them. For seven days I had blotchy red bites all over my body and unlike any mosquito I have ever encountered (and being from Minnesota, I've encountered a lot), these things itched a lot. And to top it off, I started having a severe allergic reaction to them. The little pea size bites became the size of silver dollars and started spreading. Before I knew it, they covered ever part of my body.
I was absolutely miserable. I hated being awake because it itched so badly, but I couldn't fall asleep at night (because it itched so badly). And when I did eventually close my eyes, I would wake myself up by all the scratching I was doing in my unconscious state. And that wasn't all. Before my third attempted medication started to work, my fingers started swelling from the new hives that were forming. We were far from home, so I yanked off my wedding band and put it in my wallet for safe keeping. Only to then discover, when I attempted to pay for our vegetables, that my wallet was gone. And so I cried. A lot.
But God was quick to speak. This week in Chepen we read something that challenged me. It was a psalm (13) written by King David. David was asking God how long God would hide from him and was pleading with God to change his circumstances. But then, just as swiftly, David proclaimed that He would TRUST God, REJOICE in Him and PRAISE Him. Nothing had happened yet. God hadn't answered. God hadn't changed David's life. God hadn't done a single thing. But that didn't matter to David. David chose God. And I want the strength to do the same.
So even though I'm still covered in itchy red blotches and I no longer have a wedding ring, I will choose joy. I will choose to rejoice. I will choose greatness because that is what God calls me to. Because my God is better than anything this world can offer. I will choose Him. I just hope next time I have such a big lesson to learn, I can do it in a less painful and expensive way!
Thanks for walking with me, Katie Marie
Traveling in comfort has a whole new meaning!
I could not imagine doing this without my Billy and Cristie.
After two full days of medications, my hives are slowly disappearing.
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